oh sorry
how fucking crazy will the posting be the day jk rowling dies
im holding out for her to die of like, racism poisoning or something in 2023
Like to charge, reblog to cast
huge love to all the butch lesbians that are clumsy, sloppy, or inarticulate. i love you all, and you can fumble your way straight into my heart <3
girl: what nice hair you have............. ^_^
me: *swallows my pride and bows my head down like a horse* just do it pet it you freak
my wife, upon learning that pubes can be straight: Thats not bush,,, thats just grass
Implicit storytelling in two tweets:
Yeah. They did that. I bet the ‘clarification’ came as a result of some strong legal threats.
So be aware in the coming weeks that if your favorite actor reportedly says something shitty about the strike that makes your blood boil? Check the sources. There’s going to be a lot of uh, spin in the news.
man i hate the allure of a good grilled cheese. you make one and eat it and its so good and perfect, maybe a little bland but in a good way and you instantly think “man that was a really good grilled cheese, im not entirely full yet, maybe i’ll have another…” dont do it. don’t even think about it. it’s the opposite of oreos. you make your second grilled cheese and 3 bites into it you’re so overwhelmed by the monotony. “this isnt nearly as good as the last one” despite being practically identical. The grilled cheese is a sacred food, it must be eaten hot, and quick. A second one only allows you to stew in the memories of the past (your previous cheese) and your nostalgia clouds your mind, creating an epic fail bite in your newest creation of dairy and grain. Show some restraint.
I have taken “do not make a second grilled cheese” as law and I need you to understand that it has improved my life so much.
jobs for autism boy NO phone call NO schedule NO talking to people NO emails NO computer programming or sex work NO becoming a youtuber NO starting a band NO leaving my house NO one gets mad at me. $27 per hour please
Parisitology Lab
The worst thing that happens here is that sometimes I get used as a projectile weapon when we run out of tubes but other than that, it’s a good gig.